It's been almost two weeks since our boys arrived, and what a time it has been! Thanks to everyone who's offered their support. It has come in so many ways and we truly have appreciated it. We're all doing great. Here is a little update along with a recap of what I'm sure will go down as one of the biggest days of our lives.
The latest update is that Courtenay has been discharged and after spending a number of days in the care-by-parent room at the QEH is sleeping at home again. The boys, however, are still in hospital being helped by the amazing Nursery staff. Born at 36 weeks of pregnancy we will have to be very patient. We all want to see them feeding well consistently and gaining weight day after day before taking them home. After losing a few ounces last week they both are now back to their birth weights and doing very well. With any luck they should be home soon - in advance of their actual due date which typically is used as an at-home-by date for premature babies.
The day Gram and Noah were born
The day that Gram and Noah were born was an incredible one. It wasn't like anything you hear about where both parents are rushing to the hospital in a panic. Not at all.
Courtenay spent about half of her pregnancy in hospital and there were some pretty difficult days along the way - especially between the 18-25 weeks range. We wouldn't wish that experience on anyone....but there was an upside. By the time the boys were ready to arrive Courtenay and I had seen so many doctor's, endured so many procedures and were barraged with so much medical advice that we had become somewhat experienced in the ways of our healthcare system and the ins and outs of hospitals. To those who rarely frequent them hospitals can make you feel uneasy. That was us when we started. But after spending three months in one, or in my case about 15 weekends, you do eventually become a little more comfortable. So when we visited Doctor Knickle on the morning of October 31st and he told us that we had better make our way to the hospital as it wouldn't be long now the news didn't come as any real shock. The suggestion merely conjured up thoughts of spending the next week in the hosptial. We had been hanging on for the past 18 weeks.....how immanent could it be?
After the regular visit to Dr. Knickle we went back home and made only a vague plan. I went to the computer for a couple of hours, Courtenay relaxed and packed a few things.....we had lunch. And about mid afternoon we slowly made our way to the hospital. After admitting us and going through a series of standard entrance tests all seemed quite normal. It was Hallowe'en so we were starting to think about who would be home to give out candy, and what would happen to our house if we didn't.
And then an obstetrics nurse came to get Courtenay to take her down to the delivery ward for a stress test. Thinking that this was another in the series of regular tests she would endure that day I stayed back for a nap. In fact for the next hour or so I had a fantastic little nap in her hospital bed. When I awoke it was approaching dusk and the clock was obviously wrong (it hadn't changed). I had no idea how long I had slept. But shortly thereafter a nurse came in and said Courtenay had asked for me. I followed her back to obstetrics to Courtenay with news that in fact contractions had started. Ok....so what does that mean? Does it mean they'll go away and we'll be here all week? Or does it mean this is it?
That's when a flurry of conversations began. We had been coached by several doctor's on the way in which Courtenay should deliver. Courtenay had a procedure back in week 24 that added a slight complication. Gram, the bigger of the twins, was more or less sitting on top of Noah, who was smaller and more poised to come first. This made for a good chance that Gram may shift during a natural deliver and that his big head might be tricky to get out. We had been deferring the decision as to whether or not she should have caesarian until about this time....when nothing else would change and their arrival was immanent. We took the best advice we had, by several doctors, and decided that we wanted to take no chances that Gram would have an overly difficult time au naturale. As quickly as we made the decision that Caesarian was the way to go they were preparing the operating room. Oh you mean tonight?
So after a rather relaxing day....another in a series of paces through our healthcare maze we realized in a flash that this was it! We were going to have Hallowe'en babies! It felt right. Courtenay was relaxed and ready. It was exactly eight years since we first met. If the boys were ready, the timing was as good as any. And so it was. Courtenay was prepared and I was taken to the operating room to witness what may have been the most amazing thing I have seen in my life. Noah came first. Held by his feet he was hollering before he was even out. And then less than a minute later, the same for Gram. There was nothing wrong with these boys' lungs. Despite the warnings I didn't hesitate to look over the curtain....to witness it all. And it was fine. We could see right away that the boys were of good size and energy. I had the honour of cutting both umbilical cords. And Courtenay was in tears.....more relieved than anyone that they were healthy and finally here.
Poor Courtenay had to endure the operation and a good hour in the recovery area before really seeing her boys. I was lucky enough to bring them out to see their grandparents, and their grandparents to join me in the assesment area where we all stood in amazement for hours examining the little guys. Instantly the two identities were distinct and different. Fair haired Gram, perhaps having the benefit of a few spare ounces, was mellow from the start.....and slightly irritated that we were disturbing his rest. And dark and spiky haired Noah, the wiry little guy, albeit only slightly smaller, was alert and inquisitive and more than a little feisty. Thankfully, we were home on the Island, surrounded by friends. Even in that first hour, even in that delivery room, we had familiar faces, friends who work at the QEH, welcoming them. That reminded me, again, of why we moved back here just three years ago.
Finally Courtenay was able to join us back in her room and everything started to settle down. They were finally here.
The boys
I've heard it many times, from some pretty close sources, how special it is to become parents. And yes I can say it is very true. It's an impossible thing to communicate in words. Somewhere around the seventh or eight month we started referring to them as 'the boys'. By the last few weeks we even started calling them by their names. To go from a couple of two to a family of four (plus Annie!) in what seems like an instant is quite a transformation - an experience that so few ever have the pleasure to enjoy. There is just so much meaning, so much feeling in those two words: the boys. We will enjoy watching them grow and helping them to squeeze as much out of life as we know how.
Nice.
In about 6 months, when you hear the phrase, "...they grow up so fast...", In a surreal, fast-forwarded movie but in slow motion kinda way, you'll realize it's true. Sometimes you have to remind yourself to wring every bit of enjoyment out of every phase they go through.
You will now have conversations with other parents, which you were somehow incapable of having a mere 3 weeks ago.
I was wondering if you'd mention the nap!!.....
Posted by: Jeff | November 13, 2006 at 09:49 PM
Wow!
Reading that brought tears to my eyes.
You've both went through so much, but now they are here, and they are doing good, and they're adorable...it kind of makes you forget about all the tough stuff you guys had to go through! But at the end, it's all worth it. Especially the first time you got to hold the boys!
Jeff is right, time goes by so fast, and looking at their pictures, they seem to have grown already!
The boys are very lucky to have such great parents!
Congratulations again!
See you soon,
Colette
Posted by: Colette | November 14, 2006 at 09:03 PM
I'm surprised they didn't find you taking a bath!
:) V.
Posted by: Vanessa | November 17, 2006 at 08:30 AM
Yeah V, a nice bath would have been the real topper.
Posted by: Mark | November 18, 2006 at 06:34 PM
Is there a strategy to avoid permanent mixups? hehe
Good luck and all the best,
Posted by: Matt Campbell | November 22, 2006 at 02:23 AM
Thanks Matt. Of these twins you mean?
When you're with them for two minutes you could never mix em up again.
Posted by: Mark | November 22, 2006 at 08:57 PM
Well Mark & Courteny,
You did it & Congrats to you both. We are so happy for you both. Looks like Norah will have lots of protection from Noah & Gram from any bullies, hey.
Hope to get to see the boys someday soon.
Posted by: Marian & Freeman | December 03, 2006 at 10:45 PM